Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Btw I puked in your glovebox
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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