I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
19 Unhappily Married People Confess The Red Flags They Ignored
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
These 23 People Destroyed Their Entire Lives In An Instant
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.