I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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