You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Randomize