he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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