I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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