Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
