I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
