The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Randomize
