Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
