I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
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