So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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