you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
