I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
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