ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
