Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
