He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
