just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
