im holly from the hills drunk
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
My Sexting was not on an AP level
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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