what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
