So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
