Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
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