u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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