I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
