Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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