When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
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