I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?