Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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