Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
