Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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