problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Randomize
