So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
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Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
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Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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