Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
