For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
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