i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
honey bunches of taint.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
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It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
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It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck