Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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