Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize