So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Randomize