the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize