Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
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