i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
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