You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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