Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Randomize
