i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
