i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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