her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize