She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
