chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize
