Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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