if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize